The Man of God: Allegations of Grooming, Control, and a Church in Crisis

Music Hello and welcome to another episode of the William Brannem Historical Research Podcast. I'm your host, John Collins, the author and founder of William Brannem Historical Research at William-Brannem.org, and with my very special guest, Jessica Parent, former Oneness Benecostal. Jessica, it's good to have you on and to share your story.

It is quite a wild one. I'll warn the audience now. There's going to be a lot of hanging on the edge of your seat, but we connected because you were commenting in one of the threads and YouTube channel, and I wanted to hear more about your story, and once we got into it, I was like, wow, this is much bigger than me, and it's already been all over the news.

So I'll let you introduce it. Maybe if you could just begin by telling everybody a little bit about yourself. Thanks for having me here. I'm really excited that you asked me to do this interview.

My name is Jessica Parent. Like you said, I was born and raised on this Benecostal until about six months ago, but until six months ago, I was in the church from the time I was born, except for a three-year period, when I was eight, my parents divorced, and we weren't in church for about three years, and then I got back in church and had been ever since until six months ago.

Well, as I understand it, the church that you have been a part of has gone completely viral in the news, because of all of the chaos that has happened and the allegations, et cetera.

I want to go there later, but I want to first talk about just your life in the one of Benecostal Church, because we, as Brannamites, the group that I escaped, we were one of Benecostal as well, but yet at the same time, we would not identify with other one of Benecostal's, which is kind of weird.

We had this mentality that we were the elite, but what I have found in talking to others who have come out of their Benecostal groups, a lot of the one that's Benecostals have that mentality. So, what was, just in general, what was it like being in a one that's Benecostal Church?

How did it feel growing up? What did you do? What was it like to you? Yeah, so I don't remember a whole lot from the time before we left when my parents divorced. I do vaguely remember, at about five or six years old, my mom tells me, like praying really hard for a long time, in a church service, and she told me that I was like begging to be baptized all the way home, and I don't remember that part.

But I don't have a very solid memory of those years, but... My mom and I returned in around 2003 when I was 11 and because I'm fourth and fifth generation Pentecostal on both sides of my family, I just always knew this was the truth.

I always believed it. I always knew God was one. I had to be baptized in Jesus' name, had to receive the Holy Ghost with evidence speaking in tongues. So from the time we came back to church, within about, it was probably less than a year when I got baptized officially.

And from that moment on, I of course sought for the Holy Ghost with speaking in tongues as far as I can remember, like every service from that point because if I didn't, I would be lost and going to hell.

And so that was something I sought very fervently and I didn't claim that until about another year later when I was 13. And I had just decided in my head, I'm not leaving this service until I get it.

And so I like was at the altar praying the pastor was already dismissing the service, told everybody to stand and I just ignored them. So I actually felt like I was being rebellious in a way.

But I stayed and prayed for a long time. My mom prayed with me and I can't recall actually speaking in tongues that time. But I was told that I received it and to claim it.

And I think from that point on, I just kind of learned to be more fluent in speaking in tongues, I guess. Right after that, I was asked to sing on the platform in a girl's group.

And most of my church history was me being on platform as a pretty prominent singer and soloist within the praise team and the girls group I just mentioned and the choir. And because I felt like that was my God-given talent, I felt like that was my ministry.

And in order to be on the platform, you, I mean, you really needed to be obedient to your pastor, which in so in our church, we were, I wouldn't say we're like the strictest Oh, I should add we were WPF slash independent.

So I was asking my mom about this and she said the original founder of the church was licensed through the UPC, but I, to my understanding, we were independent. I thought we were WPF this whole time, but so that's been news to me.

And for those who don't know what WPF is, if you could talk about that. So of course, the UPC is the United Pentecostal Church, which I just looked it up. I split in 2008 and WPF is the worldwide Pentecostal fellowship.

So we were either in it at some point or we were at least affiliated with it. My experience with people who have either been in or are still in the Pentecostal Church. There's a set of rules and standards that you must live by, and usually it has to do with your outward appearance. The women have long hair, long dresses.

It goes without question, I don't even have to ask you if that was the case. But what gets interesting is you mentioned that it was independent. I actually just did a podcast recently talking about the non-denominational churches. It gets odd because non-denominational in itself becomes a denomination after you do it so long. You are in the denomination of faith that is non-denominational.

And independent, it's the same word, but a different strategy, different meaning. I want to talk about what it was like as a female to have all of the rules of appearance. How did that make you feel and what was it like whenever you're around men who had a different set of standards?

So yeah, in my church, women couldn't cut their hair, had to wear skirts and dresses below the knee. On the platform as a singer, the women were required to wear nylons.

When I wasn't in church for those short three years, I was quite the tomboy, so I was already wearing pants. I had only trimmed my hair very short, I mean very like not very much when we weren't in church. And I remember feeling terrible about it even though we weren't in church just because of my history. So coming back into the church at 13 years old, 11 to 13 years old, I still was a tomboy, a war pants. In fact, when we started attending regularly, I would wear pants under a skirt because that's just what I was comfortable in. So I never really fit in with my peers because

they were more, my church was more of the, how do you say it, the more fancy dress up, like women did their hair really nice, high heels, pencil skirts. That was the type of church I was from as opposed to like maybe like skirts to the floor and like very drab, I guess. And so I didn't fit in in that way. But when I, and I was okay with that, I must find being kind of different. But when I started singing on the platform, it started to become more of a requirement to, you know, look

the part. And so, you know, I was told I needed to learn how to fix my hair up instead of wearing it down and just look, you know, nice, I guess. And so I definitely felt pressure to look that way in order to fulfill that role on the platform because I felt that singing was like my ministry or my calling. And if I weren't to do that, I would be kind of outside of the will of God or not fulfilling my purpose. I knew it would be something similar to that. I don't even have to ask the

question. But usually I do because everybody wants to talk about the fact that they had to have this appearance of being holy. And yet the interesting part, which we'll get into later, the, the appearance of holy doesn't really work for the man of God who is allegedly doing things that should not be done. I'll say it like that and I'll leave that story for you. But I want to talk about the man of God. That meaning, that word has, or that phrase, has a different meaning for people who are Pentecostal. It means different things for different groups. In some groups it's

really authoritarian. The ministers are authoritarian. In other groups it's just simply this is our spiritual guide. He's our leader. He's the one who's praying daily for the church. You go from, you go from very unhealthy to somewhat benign. How would you describe the man of God in your church? Oh yeah. We were definitely under the authoritarian type of man of God rule. It was definitely, this is the man of God. He's anointed by God. He's put in place by God. I wouldn't say necessarily that we were told, you know, even if you disagree with, or if what he says is against the Bible, you must still believe

it. I think my pastor was probably more cautious to say say things that he could back up with Bible, even if it's, you know, out of context. But it was definitely more authoritarian. I definitely felt like I had to have approval for everything I did. I had to have approval for who I dated, even who I married, what jobs I took, especially if it was going to, if it was going to be on like a church night, definitely more authoritarian. And I felt anxious a lot like walking on eggshells, like I felt like I had to ask for permission

for everything, or I was outside of the will of God. And I'm really curious to know because this is really the differing factor. Was there any theological basis for that what you would consider to be authoritarian? Did they give scriptures that backed that, or was it just something that the church learned by being part of the church? He definitely gave scriptures in like, like obey them, that have the rule over you for they watch for your souls, and they're going to give an account for you. And so basically if you didn't do what they said, or you weren't obedient to them, then you were outside of the will of God

because after all God, annoyed to them, and they put them, you know, the angel of the church, or like, basically they believed the pastor was put there by God. But my pastor was given the church by his father. And I know that he didn't actually want to be a preacher. He always talked about that. And then he kind of just realized that that was his calling. So yeah, it was always God put me here.

I'm the leader of this church. And if when it's time, God will move, will remove me. So as we're getting into this story, and this is again, this is a much bigger story than just simply being in a one is Pentecostal church, you're in the church of Shannon Burgess. And if anybody wants to go, you can look at the news. You can see what's happening with Shannon Burgess in that church right now. It is like many of the others that we have interviewed who have escaped churches where there are allegations. There are definitely allegations going on here that you can look up for yourself. I'll leave that to the people

who want to research. I'm curious to know your relationship with Shannon Burgess, though, what we get there. What was, at what point in time did he become an authority figure for you and how old were you? What was that like? What was the introduction to him?

Yeah, so when I first, well, I say when I first got in church, but it was after that sort of break when my family left and then came back. He was the assistant pastor. So my church had a Christian school, which started when we weren't going. So I never attended the Christian school. I always went to public school. But when we came, Shannon was the assistant pastor.

So his dad, Glen Burgess, was the pastor. But I never, he was always kind of like a grandfather figure to me. And I never really had like counseling from him. It was kind of like Shannon was the youth pastor at that point, plus he was like the principal of the school. And so my first memories would have been, we were coming to church. And because of my mom's situation with the person she was either, I don't know if she was already remarried at that point, she got remarried after we came back to church. So there was issues around

that that I was kind of getting scolded for. I'll just say it that way, where he became kind of this, he kind of became a father figure to me because my dad was no longer in the picture for me really. And so he kind of swooped into like give me a direction of how, you know, I should handle myself in my own home. And just like let me guide you through this, I guess. And of course, I also, I was very, I don't know if I would say, I guess maybe timid because of the situation that I had been through at home with, through my parents

divorce. I was pretty timid of authority. I would always cry when he talked to me, even if he wasn't like scolding me, I would end up emotional. And I couldn't, when we didn't know, he'd be like, why are you crying? You don't like, I don't know, actually, it was just like an anxiety response, I guess. So he became that to me and started to kind of cancel me. And then of course, being on the platform, the people in the ministry or, you know, on the music team seemed always to be closer to the pastor as well. Was he ever in private communication

with you? Like did he reach out to you where... In situations where your parents weren't around or through your phone or what what means of communication did he have with you outside of at the church which he met with me privately in the office for as long as I can remember and my peers.

At some point I was looking through things since this came out back in February and found a like an AOL messenger chat where he was asking to be I was about to be 18 in the messages I say I'm like six months from being 18 or something and I remember him saying or in in my document he says something along the lines of wanting to be able to work with me more closely like I wish you would let me counsel you

more closely type of thing and I don't know at what point he started texting me because I was on the platform we got lots of text messages for like be it practice this time can you do this solo you know that type of thing usually that was through the music leader but if but I feel like all of us on the music team how did this closer relationship with the pastor than just the general congregation and so it just felt normal and now I don't know that I do know that that AOL messenger chat was late at night and I was on a computer in my home I don't know whether my mom knew that I was talking to him. I'm pretty sure she was aware that he messaged me like text message me whenever that started I think it may have been after 18 and she was under the impression that he was just counseling me helping me through the family dynamics that were difficult and just you know basically being a father figure.

So in this past February when he resigned very drastically and publicly and we the congregation was told due to a moral failure and I went back and looked at these communications it became problematic because I realized that you can look at the chronicle article that is just came came out that he is accused of grooming and sexually abusing my peers.

And that's really scary when you think about it I've had people some on the podcast but I've had people who are contacting me they were just that close to something that could have happened and not to say that something would have but they were just that close to a situation where somebody was accused and there's allegations.

I'm pulling up the chronicle today on September 3rd it says lawsuit accuses former Chahalus pastor of grooming sexual abuse Shannon Burgess resigned from Jesus name Pentecostal Church citing moral failure. So this is an ongoing situation this apparently it has come to light that there are allegations and the lawsuits apparently are being formed.

As I understand it this is something that you are trying to work with other victims and try to get them help, is that correct? Yes, I've been a very publicly strong advocate for them, yes.

So how has the church handled all of this news breaking? What have they done in response? Yeah, so in the article, I believe the Chronicle reached out to them for comment before the news came out and I don't think they ever got a response.

I believe the first article came out this past Friday and then it came out print and print on Saturday. But by, I believe Friday night, the church website was inaccessible. It was password protected, the JNPC.org.

And then I believe by the next day, if not the next, they changed their logo and they changed their name from the Jesus name, Pentecostal Church to the Northwest Pentecostals. So of course, the community has kind of flagged them on that, so to speak like in the comments like a name change isn't gonna change, you know, the history, what's happened?

Of course, from what I'm hearing from current members, they're just trying to distance themselves from what happened and start afresh. Yeah, like I said, it's so scary. I've had people contact me and they were in situations where something could have happened and I'm not saying that something would have, but when you're that close to a situation where there are alleged victims, this really gets scary and I'm glad you're working with them.

I'm curious though, so you were in a situation where you were in the church, your parents had a situation that pulled you out of it for a period of time, then you started to go back.

So you were distanced from that connection that he had with these alleged victims. So that would have changed your perspective. I'm wondering what the relationship that you have to the other victims is like.

Do you recall what it was like being around them? Do you remember their interactions with him? Yeah, so because I spent that short amount of time out of church, which of course included being in public school and wearing pants and watching movies, I felt like I had a different perspective coming back into it as opposed to my peers that were born and raised in it, went to the Christian school, never had that outside influence.

Now while I will say that while I was in public school, once I came back to the church, was baptized, claimed the Holy Ghost, I definitely held to the standard even in public school.

I was kind of an outcast at school and of course as a Pentecostal, you kind of wear that as a badge of honor. Like, you know, I'm different, I'm a peculiar person, you know, and so I proudly was a Pentecostal at public school.

And so I didn't fit in in public school, but I also didn't fit in with my peers at church because they were born and raised in it. They had a certain culture about them that I didn't relate with and those...

Three years, it sounds so short looking back, but it really felt like a long time to me. I mean, between 11, no, eight and 11 years old, something about that time frame, like just felt like a long time to me.

And so I had the situation with my family that made me hyper aware of certain things. And then I was in public school and so I was learning, you know, I don't totally know the difference between what's taught at public school in the Christian school because I never went, but I just had, you know, different people around me.

I was used to advocating for what I believed in against these other people, you know, in the world, I guess. And my peers were just used to being with their peers and having the communications with their peers.

I feel like I was a different, I was just a different person in the church compared to my peers. And Shannon had a closer relationship to them than me during those years because they went to the Christian school as far as I'm aware.

And I know that Shannon, because he canceled me, privately and personally, that he knew how I felt about certain abuses. I was very hyper aware of like mental and emotional abuse. And what has always been hurtful and now I know that I have, now that things are where they are now, I know that these things were said to other people as well.

Because he was kind of my father figure and I kind of have my dad in my life and I was kind of like looking for belonging and love. At a young age, I really was seeking like a boyfriend and you know, with the thought of marriage and getting away.

And I just know that has only advised to me really, the only advice he really gave to me was that I needed to lose weight. And looking back on pictures, I wasn't even that big compared to other times in my life.

And so I was always self-conscious and my peers were always skinnier and prettier. And there was definitely this culture of like competition between the girls, I guess. And I don't hold that against my peers at all.

I really feel like it was coming from the top down and personal counsel and instruction of that kind of thing. And I'm reading the news article. It says the complaint alleges that Burgess began grooming the plaintiffs when they were 15 and 12.

After he'd learned they were sexually abused by a former fellow church member. And it goes on to say that there was a situation where he was allegedly abusing a person who was 16 and continued until, I guess it was 2014 when she put a stop to the abuse.

So when you look around your peers and you see, I know this person, I know that they have been. allegedly part of the situation. It's really difficult because you were right in the midst of it.

You were potentially a target if this, if their claims are true, you were potentially a target. How does that make you feel about your relationship in the church? Yeah, it's really scary looking back. I spent about two or three days since this happened going through years of text messages. All the way back as I could, I have all of my old phones.

And so I charged them up and I went back as far as I could. And I really saw the grooming behavior. Even though I don't think I was ever really a target, just because I wasn't his type, you know, since the only advice given to me was to lose weight. And I also feel like because I was hyper aware of certain abuses, I don't think he would have even tried that with me, and especially also because I was in public school. But it was very, it became very obvious to me the grooming behavior. The like, I love you. I care about you. If you need anything, call me, contact me anytime.

I like those messages became very blatantly obvious. So it was under the guise of, you know, this father figure, man of God, cares about me in my life and my salvation. And so if you read the newspaper article, they reached out to me with some questions the day before it came out. I believe last Friday. And I had mentioned that even though I wasn't necessarily groomed to be sexually abused, and I wasn't sexually abused, I do feel like I was groomed to put my entire trust in this person. Like I could call them anytime. They'd be there anything you need. I don't, I wouldn't

say that I was given far and above monetary assistance. But you know, that that was always there. Like, you know, if you really needed it crash and burn, I will be there to be this your savior.

And I've said this even on my YouTube channel that I believe he and I believe he purposely became the hero in everybody's story so that nobody would believe anything if it ever came out.

I've said that pretty much from the beginning of this and I will hold to that that he purposely, very purposely, um, became your best friend, became your champion so that you would never think any ill will. You couldn't even believe it if, if what has allegedly come out actually happened.

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So I'm going through the newspaper article as you're talking, and this one comment really stands out to me. It says, in one video, parent who is you describes an incident that occurred when you were between 13 and 16 years old, participating in a puppet ministry.

In one practice, the man leading the puppet ministry, whom you do not name in the video, calls you sexy. The reason I wanted to talk about this is because in the Pentecostal faith, you are told that you are dressing that way because it's holy, but more than that, you're dressing that way so that men don't look at you and lust.

That's, I grew up with the same Pentecostal doctrines, I know how it is. They will put the blame on the female for the way that she is dressed. If you're wearing blue jeans or pants or slacks, they say that's your fault because the man's lusting after you, it's your fault.

But yet you're in a ministry like this where I'm assuming you are wearing the Pentecostal holiness clothing, and he's calling you sexy. So I remember that circular reasoning, and I remember there's a point in my life as a male when I was thinking, I'm not certain that that doctrine is correct because females, there is a connection that you have anyway.

So can you really say that the Pentecostal doctrine is correct in that aspect, and it made me, after I left, I started to think through all of the other things that they did with regards to holiness that were literally just rules to bind the women up.

I could think of no better reason, and it wasn't, I will probably embarrass my wife, but it wasn't until we were talking one day, and she says, I remember when I was out on a swing, and I was wearing the dress, and I was with other children, other female children who had pants on, and they were actually more modest because they were swinging with pants on, and it suddenly struck me, you know, that modesty thing, it doesn't really have to do with the pants, there's something off here.

And then to read this comment, I wanted to ask you just about your feelings around that statement. What was it like for you, whenever this man said this? Yeah, first I'll just speak to what your wife experienced, it just brought back to memory.

One time we were doing a little photo shoot for the girls group we were singing in, we ended up making a CD in 2012, and we wanted to kind of all look similar with like, and a short springy skirts and stuff.

And I remember I was leaning over into a window speaking to somebody and the wind blew my skirt up and there was a guy on the property and I was so embarrassed, but yeah, definitely.

And especially now that I have a daughter like seeing her play on the playground, it's like, and we weren't, oh boy. When my daughter was not even just a few weeks old, I got a call from my pastor saying, I've noticed you've put your daughter in like leggings type of things or even footy pajamas.

And I was wondering when you planned to put her in a dress. And I was like, probably when she's able to walk.

And so I was obedient and I got rid of every little leggings and I only put her in tights. But like literally on the playground on a sliders wing, the leggings are much more modest.

So just to speak to that that you mentioned. But yes, when I was in that public, or when I was in the puppet ministry practice,

I remember sitting at a table with Keith Adams who was leading it. And because I was already at that point insecure, especially because I had been told by my pastor that I should seek to lose weight if I wanted to get a boyfriend, I said something about it.

Like I was like, oh, well, I'm not attractive or I'm something. And he was like, oh, well, I think you're sexy. And then Lauren Bells immediately went off. Like I was like, that's not okay for him to say that.

And be it because of my experience growing up or being in public school. Whatever the reason is, I knew that wasn't okay. And so I immediately took that to Shannon because I felt closer to him.

I don't think he was the pastor yet at the time, but he was basically my pastor. And I told him what had happened. Well, the very next service or two later, Keith Adams was came up to me publicly.

And was like, what's wrong? What happened? Was this something I said? And I remember just kind of walking away and then going to Shannon again and being like, he's asking me this. And he had Shannon said, well, I just told him he needed to leave you alone.

And so it always bothered me that first of all, he made that comment and it wasn't really taken care of. And secondly, he was told to leave me alone and didn't. Now he didn't persist after that interaction because I steered clear of him, but I honestly didn't feel very safe because he had purposely came to me in a public service even after he was told not to.

So we're going to circle back to the man of God thing. In the Pentecostal church, they have these altar calls. I've been to them. I know what it's like. I remember all of the children lined up, especially the teenagers.

I remember the females crying their hearts out, and I remember what it was like when you approached the altar call, you were approaching the man of God. I clearly remember how that felt. You felt like there was this connection to the Spirit that you could not get anywhere else, and it's sad now that I look back on that because according to the Bible, you should be able to talk directly to God yourself.

You don't need a mediator between God and man, but these altar calls had this, and I'm assuming I'm guessing that you had altar calls in your church. If you did, what was that like, and what was the man of God like in this situation, now knowing what we know about him?

As long as I can remember, we've always had an altar call following a preached word. So, in our church, it started with like music and singing, then maybe a little bit of fellowship time, then like offering, and then preaching, and then an altar call.

So at the altar call, we would gather together up front, men on one side and women on the other side, and it's been like that for as long as I can remember, and of course the pastor would pray for people, not necessarily every single person because it was encouraged for every person to join up front.

But anybody that was like particularly touched was particularly emotional, usually was prayed for with like laying on of hands by the pastor. I, from the time I was seeking the Holy Ghost every single service to after, I always made it a point to go and pray, and was very sincere.

I remember an evangelist one time saying, like you're so sensitive, it seems like, to the Holy Ghost, like don't ever lose that, because I was, I don't know, I just, because it was so real to me, and I wanted to be saved, and I wanted to be used, I wanted to reach the lost, I was very fervent and sincere every service as much as I could be.

I remember one time when I was 15 years old, so my pastor Shannon Burgess was not the type to say, does say the Lord or God told me this, it was more like he would preach on his certain scripture and expound on it, and maybe say, God's leading him here or there.

But in this specific instance, it was some time at past during an altar call, most people had kind of filtered out, and he came up to me and he said, I don't know why I feel like this, but I believe God is telling me to tell you that if you stay in the will of God, you will reach thousands.

So I was 15 years old at that time. I was obviously still in public school, I was a singer on the platform, and that moment paved these last, well, I'll see, I'm 34, so these last 15 plus years of my life to be like a soul winner or like trying to reach the loss like this is my calling this is what I'm supposed to do and I'm I also you know I'm a singer and people have told me I'm anointed and that my singing touches them and so I gave my all every service every time I was on the platform

singing while I was in public school I always tried to look for opportunities to invite people to church I carried my Bible with me to school I carried a notebook that had every scripture reference that I would have used as an argument against you know questions that that came at me I remember one time a boy in school in high school asked me why I always were addressed and I was like well because it's women's apparel and he was like well what about kilts and that always stuck with me because I didn't really have a good answer but I'm just I'm just saying that to say that I you

know purposed in my heart to be the best witness I could be to reach people to the best of my ability I even had a couple school friends come to church with me a few times one was even baptized and claimed to the Holy Ghost as well but so because of that like I participated in my high school talent shows in my junior senior year I made I ended up making a homemade CD because I'm a singer songwriter everything was pointed towards outreach I I don't know if you're familiar with hope core through Wilson University but I attended that between 2015 2016 I didn't actually

graduate because I didn't take the mission trip so it's like a course through Wilson University where you're learning like the doctrine and how to be you know how to do outreach and it's supposed to culminate in this missions trip to either Brazil or wherever I wasn't comfortable with that nor did I have the money so I didn't actually graduate so everything pointed me towards being a light and a witness I in this timeline that I have I then got married I had my children and in being a stay at home mom I was trying to figure out ways to create an income

and so my pastor who taught completely against social media of any kind that was like a big deal which looking back now it's like I think he was just trying to control the narrative as much as possible he allowed me to have Facebook and stuff in YouTube to promote my music so I was writing music I was playing music I was writing songs and I thought of that as you know outreach but he also was trying to push me to be able to see if I could get like my YouTube monetized so I was very

public to the point of even last year I was also in the Chronicle for a an international singing competition because of my Facebook page, they actually reached out to me directly and asked me to participate.

And it's called, it's called, you got's music. And so I participated in that. I was in the Chronicle for that. And I thought, I really thought I was like, wow, this is a great, a huge opportunity.

Like, I'm going to be in the Chronicle. Like my church is, there was vote donations given. Like that was how the competition went. And so the vote donations you got to choose a beneficiary.

So I chose my church. I made sure all of that went to our building fund. I created a YouTube video where I went through the history of our church. I used videos and used the website for, you know, the dates.

And then I gave clips of the building plans that we had. And everything was like propping up the church, you know, through me, through my music. So when the resignation happened this past February, and I started to kind of see this cover up happening, and I also realized the gut feelings I had at times of abuse, like spiritual abuse, like the authority being over the top, like all of that became valid.

Like I started researching spiritual abuse before I even completely left the church. Once I decided to step away from the church entirely, I was supposed to just be kind of a break. I decided to open up a public conversation via Facebook and YouTube to ask these questions about doctrine and kind of get a response outside of what was given to me by just my pastor.

And so I still had a heart to be a witness. And I thought I reached out to a neighboring pastor who already had a social media presence that was already like combating deconstruction stuff online.

And I reached out to him if he would do a video with me of me asking questions and him giving me the answers. And I really thought I would circle back and be like, okay, I have solidified my faith.

This is right and true. And now I can move forward. And you know, maybe this thought process of asking questions publicly will bring other people, you know, into the knowledge of the full truth, if you will.

That was turned down by that pastor I reached out to. So then I started my diaries of a deconstructing one is Pentecostal series on my YouTube channel, asking these questions, finding the answers for myself.

And I've been very, very public about it on YouTube and Facebook. I've also very publicly supported my peers that have come out with their claims of the abuse. And I felt that because I had been so public about inviting people to the church because that was my entire identity.

Everybody in public school knew me is, you know, the girl that had long. Aaron Scurts, I was in the newspaper last year. I felt it was important to me to be just as public with my criticisms and my deconstruction as I was in favor of the church.

And so that's kind of led me to meeting you. So let's fast forward to today. All of these things have allegedly happened. You can walk through the timeline. If you want to learn more about this, you can just go to the Google News that's where I found it.

Just type in Shannon Burgess and you can find all of this information. So all of these things have allegedly happened. And then I can only imagine just based off of some of the churches that I have came from.

Whenever something happens that is very critical from the outside of the church, the church tends to band together and start to point fingers at different people or different groups who might have caused the critical information to leak out.

Did this happen in your church? And what happened to the families that are involved? I'm, again, thinking back to some of the scenarios that I remember and it just tore families apart in our churches.

What was it like in your church? Like I said, I left pretty early on when things broke. It was February 1st when the announcement came that Shannon was resigning about a week or so later when I had started studying spiritual abuse.

I took myself off of the platform because I realized that that was kind of how I was controlled. And then about a week or two later, I stopped attending entirely after I had published on my Facebook page a poem about my experience.

It really outlined a little bit of the history we've already talked about and then the day that it happened and how I felt. And from that moment on, I have been very public. I remember every day that I had made it continue to make posts being scared to look at my phone when I woke up in the morning, you know, afraid of the backlash that would happen.

And instead, I found people were encouraging me. Even people within the movement, like within our fellowship, I got messages even from ministers and their wives saying, we agree with you. Like this isn't being handled properly.

Don't stop talking about it. Of course, they probably weren't betting on me completely leaving the faith, but I was open the whole time. I said, these are my questions, give me your feedback. This is what has happened and this is what I don't agree with.

So I have unfortunately become a target of, I guess, an accusation like you're mentioning pointing fingers now that the newspaper article has come out, people are feeling that I am trying to tear the church down.

As far as the church, my home church goes, I am standing against what happened and how it was seemingly kind of being covered up. And just like... move forward. So I'm standing against that. I kind of put that in a different box. I have this box of supporting my peers that were victims and then I have this box of deconstructing. And I'm sure people have conflated the two and it is what it is. But so the Chronicle actually reached out to me.

I believe the first article came out this past Friday and they reached out to me the day before asking for comments. I didn't ask them to tell my story. They you know contacted me on on those questions and I didn't bother to ask to be anonymous. Other people that went to the Chronicle chose to be anonymous which that's fine. But I chose not to because after all I'm already very public. People would have figured out it was me that said what I said. And so people have accused me of just attention seeking. I'm just trying to gain followers type of thing and that

was never what it was about. I felt like I needed to stand for what I thought was right. I had been very public in supporting the church and it was my entire identity. So as I mentioned in the last segment that was a big deal to me to bring people along this journey with me.

Also because I have been public because my name is out there. People that have been in the church in the past within our fellowship have reached out to me saying hey this is what I saw happen.

This is what happened to me and I've been able to point them to the right authorities to report certain things. So yeah it's caused a giant flurry of emotions and people that still don't really believe the accusations because the ministry told the church it was multiple acts of adultery instead of grooming and sexual abuse. So the victims pretty much got pushed out of the local congregation because they were being accused of adultery as opposed to know this happened from the time that they were in school and you know even if it wasn't to adulthood when you've

been abused and groomed and this is your man of God who has all authority in your life and you don't question it like I don't blame them at all for for what has happened and I'm appalled at anybody that does. So even though Shannon Burgess has been removed from the church he still has family that attends the local assembly and because the victims never felt supported in the assembly like the truth never really got told and gossip started and threats were being made they them and their families and you know friends closer friends have actually left and went to an

entirely different church and not only those issues even it's trickled down to even even my immediate family like things are being brought up from years and years ago that happened in the church that were covered up. And because now it's public, there are people commenting left and right of, well, this happened to me and this and that and there's accusations being thrown around everywhere. And so it's been really stressful. Um, and yeah, really, really hurtful. I've lost friends and family through all of this. It's just so sad to me. I remember whenever I began my journey, I actually started to prove my faith. I actually started not to call anything out,

not to dig any of this history up. I would, I just simply wanted to prove the faith for myself. Is this real? Is this thing that I'm in real? And I created, it's a long history, I've talked about a few times, but I created a little site where I could put some notes up to ask my grandfather questions and that turned into, oh my gosh, there aren't really answers to these questions to, oh my gosh, look what all has been covered up for all of these years. So it kind of developed that way.

But there was a point in time whenever I started to network with people who had been similarly spiritual, uh, spiritual abuse like I was. And what was really sad is it went beyond spiritual abuse. I started having people contact me and they were telling me stories that I just, I couldn't believe. And they were stories about people that I knew of. I knew exactly who they're talking about. I can't believe that this person did this to this other person. And it seemed to be widespread. The problem is from what I can tell, when you're in this type of mentality where

we must hold together, we must at all cost keep the news media from understanding that there's a problem in our church because we must hold together, we must, we must create mental walls around us so that people don't leave. You, you're accelerating that problem, definitely accelerating that problem. And whether you like it or not, people, if you do this, people are going to leave the faith because you do this beyond the situation that if the allegations are true, you need to probably leave this church anyway if the allegations are true. So you've got this mentality where people

are trying to hold together, but the problem is, like you said, families break apart. And so for me, he gets really sad when I think through this, I'm sad for the victims, I'm sad for the people, the alleged victims, I'm sad for the people who are families of the alleged victims. I'm sad for the whole situation. And I would like for people to give you some support. So where can they go to find you on the internet? So I have a YouTube channel. I think my handle is Jessica P dot official.

But if you just search diaries of a deconstructing one, it's been a call still. My entire story is there. I have about 20 episodes now. I'm also pretty active on Facebook. That is actually where I post the most because I like to just, it's really been like a place to do like mentally dump thoughts and ideas and questions and get feedback. I've received a lot of support from there.

also on Instagram and I even made a TikTok recently, but I'm not as active on those forums.

And yeah, I have music. I actually have music on streaming services. My latest song is called the Scales Fall, which I began writing during this past six months. I usually write a song within a day or two, but this one I got a few lines and I really sat on it for a while while I was continuing to deconstruct. I did a Bible study through Berean Holiness about grace and I wanted to wait until after that to finish writing this song and so I that recently came out. I believe it was August 1st that it was released and so that's available either on my YouTube or streaming services.

And yeah, I appreciate everybody that has reached out to me in support and with their stories and telling me not to stop and don't shut down my voice just because of the naysayers. And please keep speaking out on behalf of those that can't yet speak out.

Well, I'm very glad that you're working to help the alleged victims. I'm hopeful that you can do some good in the community and I'm very glad that there are other churches who are supporting you regardless of what faith you're in. This is a problem that it goes beyond church boundaries.

If you're in a church and you see something like this happening, you should reach out. I'm hoping that there are other churches that will reach out and give you some support and hopefully people listening can also come and give you some support. Thank you so much for doing this.

Yeah, thank you so much for having me on. It's to be able to tell my story. Well, if you've enjoyed our show and you want more information, you can check us out on the web.

You can find us at www.William-Branum.org. For more about the dark side of the new apostolic reformation, you can read Weaponized Religion from Christian Identity to the NAR. Available on Amazon, Kindle, and Audible.

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